Piano Keys
by Upside-Up
Summary: Post "Hairography". Part two, this time from Artie's POV. "You don't want to be the guy who sits around and waits."
1. Chapter 1

You notice it first but you don't say anything. Partially because no one would _ever_ believe you and partially because saying it out loud might make it true. And sister, you do _not_ want this shit to actually be happening. So you brush it aside and ignore it, looking the other way during your rehearsals for the hair number, trying not to notice how much prettier she is with her hair down and how long her legs look in those stupid jean shorts and how she's been choreographed to be all over him.

But ignoring it isn't working because it _keeps happening_. She stands next to him when everyone is warming up; she turns to him, sometimes, instead of Santana to explain things she doesn't understand; you're pretty sure the last time you walked by his Calc. class she was sitting next to him. You feel like your chance at a second chance with Artie is slipping away.

You're not sure what to do, exactly. Your relationship has changed ever since you dropped the stutter bomb, and you don't know how to fix it. There's a tug on your heart when she skips over to him and high-fives him because they got matching shirts for the Cyndi Lauper number and he smiles that enormous smile at her instead of you. You try to make eye contact while you sing about rainbows, but his gaze isn't directed at you. Not this time.

Sure, you guys are friends still, and he still walks you to classes and laughs at your jokes and calls you during American Idol; but he doesn't look at you the way he used to and it's a little more than heart breaking.

And, let's face it; you're jealous as all hell.

It doesn't feel fair. And it's your fault, you know, but it doesn't feel _fair_. Because you know what you want, it's sitting there right in front of you, smiling and singing, and Brittany has no idea how amazing he is.

She has no idea how privileged you are when Artie Abrams looks at you that way.

And soon enough, other people are starting to notice, too. Santana cocks her eyebrow and frowns when Brittany says she'll catch up with her in the cafeteria and waits for Artie to navigate himself out of the classroom. Mercedes gives you a pitying look when Artie starts carrying Britt's books to class for her. Kurt pulls you into the girls' room and tells you to take deep breaths the first time they're witnessed kissing in the halls. And you do, you breathe, and your heart breaks because you just realized that you _love_ him, damn it, and it's too late.

You pull away, kicking yourself for breaking down your stuttering wall of defense and getting hurt. You don't answer his calls on Thursday nights. You hang out at Kurt's more and throw yourself into Glee and school. You cry at night when your parents are gone and you can just hate yourself for a little while.

You go to the winter formal with Kurt because Mercedes is bringing one of the guys from the Halverston glee club, and you try not to notice how beautiful Brittany looks on the arm of your best friend. Kurt forces you to dance to every number and you have to admit that when the entire glee club and football team hit the dance floor for 'Single Ladies' you're having a pretty good time.

Then Artie asks you to dance while Brit dances with Mike Chang and all you want to do is stutter 'N-n-n-o thanks,' and hide in the coat room, but you nod your head and take his hand instead.

He looks up at you with that adorable almost-smile and pats his knee. You have a seat in his lap and carefully fold your arms around him, resting your cheek on the curve of his neck. He keeps one hand on your back and the other on his wheel, rotating it so you're swaying back and forth. He's humming along to the song and you feel like you're exactly where you belong until you catch Kurt's eye, and he's looking at you like his heart is breaking for you. It's then that you remember Britt, and that you're not really supposed to be here, with Artie; that this is her place and you're just borrowing it for a song. Suddenly Artie has pulled his head from yours and is looking you straight in the eye, asking if you're okay.

Your tears have moistened the skin on his neck, you realize, and you're crying in front of the whole school. Mortified, you struggle out of his grip and stumble, red-faced, to the washroom.

You feel like a walking cliché, but you can't help the sobs that are coursing through your body. You splash water on your face to no avail and hear the door open behind you. You groan, embarrassed, and wait for Kurt's slightly sarcastic, comforting words. Instead, though, there's a long pause.

"Tina?"

You look up and see Brittany standing there, beautiful in her long, sequined dress, a concerned look on her face.

You suddenly feel like you might throw up and moan, "Oh god."

"Are you okay?" She asks, her tone soft.

You have absolutely no idea what to tell her, so you lean back against the counter and shake your head. She walks over and gives you a hug in true, sweet, stupid, Brittany style, and you feel like crap. You hug her back and force a smile onto your face when she pulls away.

"Is it because your hair keeps doing that thing?" She asks, and you choke out a sob that almost sounds like a laugh. She reaches over and does something to your hair, and the expensive up-do your mother paid for instead of helping you get ready for the dance falls in loose curls around your shoulders. You look in the mirror and you have to admit, you look a lot better.

"Thanks," you say, and she smiles and bounces out of the room.

After that day, you avoid Artie like the plague. You're horrified that you cried in his arms in front of the whole school and you even briefly consider quitting glee before Kurt literally slaps your face and says "don't. you. dare."

If people notice that you barely speak to him anymore, they don't let on.

But toward the end of the year, there's a shift in the energy of the club. Everything has been tense recently due to impending nationals and Quinn's impending due date, but recently, there's been something else. Something feels off.

You try to analyze it, and you scan the room during rehearsal, trying to figure it out. The Rachel-Finn-Quinn-Puck quadrangle is ever present, Mike and Matt are clueless as usual, Mercedes is happily showing Kurt the bling her deaf boyfriend got her, and Santana is stuck to the side of Brittany who just seems… sad. Artie is quietly strumming his guitar over by the piano. By himself.

Something inside you shifts.

After practice, you can tell he's loitering, killing time in the choir room so he doesn't have to go wait in the parking lot for his ride with everyone else. You linger, too. You miss him, for goodness sake, why not?

And you love him, and he looks sad. And that hurts your heart, so you hang back.

"Hey Artie," you walk slowly up behind him as he's putting his guitar in its case.

He twists in his chair to see you standing behind him and he smiles a little, directly at you. "Hey, Tina."

There's no malice in his voice. In fact, he seems happy to see you, if a little tired and worn out. His voice sounds kind of hoarse, actually, which you find interesting because it sounded so clear and beautiful during rehearsal.

"You look a little down," you say to his back as he finishes latching his guitar case. He wheels over to the piano and you sit on the bench, poke at a few keys.

He shrugs wearily, "I'm okay, really. Just, yeah, kind of down."

His eyes watch your hands on the keys. "What's wrong?" you ask, plunking out a clumsy version of 'twinkle, twinkle'.

He takes a breath in and bunches his shoulders up in a prolonged shrug before letting them fall, sighing.

"Britt and I broke up," he says, bringing a hand up to accompany your awkward notes, playing smooth chords on the lower keys. You find yourself thinking that it sounds rather pretty.

"I'm sorry," you say, and you _are_ sorry. You don't want him to be upset, and you really do like Brittany, despite yourself.

"It's okay," he says quietly, still watching your fingers as his own play alongside. "I didn't really think it would last. I just feel bad that she's so upset about it. I hate hurting people's feelings."

You're not sure you believe that he's really as okay as he claims, but you nod your head.

And there's only the sound of the piano, for a while.

"Tina?"

"Yeah?"

He stops playing and places his fingers over yours, stilling them. "Can we be friends again?"

You smile a little and nod again. He looks relieved and his face brightens, if only slightly. "Good, I missed you."

"I missed you too," you say. You can't help but think that maybe this is your second chance. His hand is still covering yours on the piano keys.


	2. Chapter 2

A.N.:

Thanks so much for the reviews, everyone. They're like little love letters, it's great! Here is part two for you!

This one is the same story told from Artie's POV, and hopefully I didn't make him come across as less wonderful than he is. Re-reading it I found myself feeling really bad for Brittany, but hey, break-ups suck for everybody, and I feel like Artie handled it the best he could.

Anyway, enjoy!

It takes you a while to notice it, if you're honest. You spend most of your time watching Tina's gaze snap away every time you look at her, so it takes a while before you realize that there's someone else trying to catch your eye. You don't believe it at first, because you're you and she's… everything a normal, red-blooded teenaged boy could want poured into a cheerleading uniform, and you tell yourself you're just imagining it.

It sticks in your mind, though, the way she's kind of always around now, and how she's always looking at you like you're the most interesting thing on the planet. You find yourself wondering what being with her would really be like. She hovers near you, quietly, patiently, and during breaks in the choreography for the Hair number, she rests in your lap like it's the most natural thing in the world.

At school you're distracted and keep thinking about that moment when her eyes find you the second she walks into the choir room and she gives you a little wave.

At one point it hits you that Brittany, one of the hottest girls at McKinley and a Cheerio, no less, might maybe have a thing for you. And you scoff inwardly a little when you realize she's your second choice.

But Tina has been acting weird, and you're not sure if anything will ever be back to how it used to be. And you don't want to be the guy who sits around and waits.

So you focus away from Tina, and try to figure out this Brittany thing. You smile wider at her and answer her questions kindly and accurately and you listen to the rare things she has to say. She's so honest and laughs so readily and she knows who she is. She looks you in the eye and isn't ashamed to ask stupid or inappropriate questions, and you start to realize that you might maybe have a thing for her, too.

She's so excited that you both get to wear orange shirts for True Colours that you feel guilty being taken in by Tina's beautiful singing, and spend the entire number looking anywhere but at your best friend. You know you still have feelings for her, but you're determined to move forward. You laser-focus your attention on Brittany, and decide it's best for everyone if you forget you and Tina were ever almost anything more than friends.

Being with Britt is really actually kind of… awesome. She waits for you after glee practice, she is amazed and blushes when you offer to carry her books, and she unabashedly kisses you in public. She has no filter, so you often get to hear things like "what? Oh, I was just thinking about how hot you would look holding a sword," and it makes you laugh. She asks very politely if you could maybe un-tuck that sweater-vest from your pants and that it's for your own good and her honesty is just so great that you only feel a teeny bit insulted.

The conversations the two of you have are far from how you'd ever imagined them. She really does have some interesting things to say, she just has trouble getting her ideas out. And it's a really nice feeling when she's fascinated by everything about you. She asks the questions other people are too afraid to ask, and you find yourself telling her all about you as she listens intently. She even asks how functional you are penis-wise and you laugh and reassure her and ignore the little sting in your chest that comes with any thought of Tina.

She's more experienced than you, but who isn't? You spend evenings on her living room couch entwined in each other and you have to admit, for someone who doesn't get great marks in school, she sure has a lot to teach a guy.

You ask her to the winter formal and you think she's more thrilled to go tux-shopping with you than to go to the actual formal. She picks out a great suit for you and tells you that you look hot and laughs when you do a couple spins for her at the shop. She never says a word about how long it takes you to change and, because it's Britt, you know it's not out of politeness, but that she probably doesn't even notice. It's a nice thought.

Your dad drives you both to the dance and she kisses you slightly inappropriately when you slip her corsage on her wrist. As soon as your dad has driven off she looks you dead in the eye and asks if you're going to have sex after the dance. You're stunned for a minute but you regain your composure, deciding to take a cue from her and be honest.

"Well, yeah, that was the plan."

She smiles at you and kisses you and you head into the over-decorated gym together, laughing.

You have a great time at the dance, and thank your lucky stars when Britt presses her flip-cam into your hand while an abnormally large group of students bust out their 'Single Ladies' moves. You record the whole thing, your laughter shaking the camera. You catch Tina in the lens and linger for a moment, because she looks downright beautiful.

You dance most of your dances with Britt perched in your lap, but at once point Mike cuts in and steals her away and Tina catches your eye again. She's standing alone at the edge of the dance floor and before you know what you're doing, you're taking her hand and looking into her eyes and asking her to dance with you.

She pauses for a moment but to your great relief she agrees. She climbs into your lap and wraps her arms around you and your mind stops working for a moment, focusing only on how amazing she smells and how comfortably she fits in your lap as compared to Britt, who's a little pointy in places. Your heart beats faster and you wrap one arm all the way around her back and press her to you. You feel like you have everything in the world in your arms.

Then suddenly you feel a cool wetness on your skin and you realize she's crying and you have no idea why. You pull your head away from hers and ask her if she's okay and she all but wrenches herself away from you and runs to the girls' room.

Your eyes follow her form and then Britt is at your side, asking what happened. You tell her you have no idea and your eyes are glued to the girls' room door. Britt stands beside you for a few moments before eventually walking into the washroom herself.

It's only then that you realize what an asshole you are. Brittany likes you, a lot. She's sweet and gorgeous and makes you laugh. Tonight is going to be _the_ night.

And all you can think about is Tina.

Moments later, Britt comes out of the washroom shrugging. "Hair problems," she says.

You're distracted for the rest of the night and you don't see Tina again. After the dance there's a handi-capable taxi waiting outside and you go home to Britt's empty house and it's everything you could want it to be. It's awkward and a little weird and you both end up exhausted and sweaty and giggling.

And all you can think about is Tina.

You feel like a total jerk and vow to be a better boyfriend to Britt and avoid Tina like it's your job. This turns out to be an easy task since she is apparently avoiding you, too.

But Brittany, for all her naiveté, notices something is up. Your relationship shifts sometime in early spring and she stops smiling so much. You stop sleeping together. And one day she finally just comes out and says it, and you're impressed that she managed to hold it in so long.

"Artie?"

You're watching TV at your house, sitting on the couch with about six inches of space between you, holding hands. You can hear the gravity of her tone so you mute the TV and turn to look at her.

"You don't want to be my boyfriend anymore, do you?"

You have no idea what to say, so you shake your head and apologize. She tells you that it's okay, and she's never lied to you before, so you believe her. She kisses you on the cheek and stands up to leave. She's almost at the door when she stops, turns around and comes back into the living room.

"Still friends though, okay?"

You promise, crossing your heart, and try to act like you didn't notice the tears in her eyes. As she leaves your chest feels tight and you feel like maybe you might cry, too. You tell yourself it's for the best. You think of Tina and it doesn't make you feel any better. The next morning you still feel like crap, but somehow you also feel a little lighter, like maybe now things can go back to the way they were.

To your surprise, breaking up with Britt doesn't instantly make things normal again. You feel isolated. You rarely see Britt and when you do she looks sad and only half smiles at you. You miss her a little. You've stopped avoiding Tina but she's still avoiding you, and you have no idea where to go. At glee practice, Santana is shooting you dirty looks and Tina is avoiding eye contact so you just focus on your guitar.

After practice a week or so after the break-up, you're packing your things to go when you hear a familiar voice say your name. Your heart leaps in your chest, but you're so confused and tired and emotionally drained now that it only barely shows on your face. You twist a little in your chair and say "hey, Tina."

"You look a little down," she says, and you can barely believe she's standing there. How had she known you were looking a little down if she hadn't been looking at you for months?

You shrug, not quite sure what to say. You don't want to worry her. You don't want to do anything to hurt her, ever. She sits down in front of the piano and you roll over beside her. "I'm okay, really. Just, yeah, kind of down."

Her fingers are playing a clumsy tune and for some reason it's the most beautiful sound you can imagine right now. You watch her black-polished fingers, mesmerized.

"What's wrong?" She asks, and you don't take your eyes of her delicate hand.

You realize that she must somehow not know about you and Britt. You never told anyone, and Britt's been pretty stuck to Santana's side ever since. You feel yourself shrug.

"Britt and I broke up," and you raise your hand to play alongside hers. You want to feel close to her again, even if you are just two parts of the same harmony.

There's a very brief pause in the notes and Tina plays on, asking if you're okay. You try to tell her as best you can that you're not devastated, that the break-up was something you wanted.

Tina doesn't say anything, and there's only the sound of the piano, for a while.

You sit and listen, and you watch Tina's long, delicate, clumsy fingers and you inhale her amazing scent and you miss everything that used to feel so normal. You want to take her in your arms and kiss her; you want to tell her you never stopped thinking about her. But things are so screwed up and so different now that you know you can't just jump in. Baby steps.

"Tina?"

She looks at you. "Yeah?"

And you place your hand over hers, silencing the room.

"Can we be friends again?"

Because 'friends' is a start. 'Friends' is where it all began and 'friends' is what has to happen before anything more can. You can feel your heart pounding as you wait for her response, and her small nod sends a wave of relief through you.

"Good," you say, "I missed you," and it's true and it feels fantastic to say. She tells you she missed you too, and you just smile.

You feel like you're at the start of something. You don't move your hand from hers and the piano keys.


End file.
